Joke collection nr. 4
by Jacob Holdt

Note: these jokes (uncensored and certainly not all 
politically correct) are shown in the order I received them 
in emails from good and really "bad" American friends. 
I may have many jokes, but even I don't "get them all." 
{ Go to (better?) jokes 1, 2, 3, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13 }
{ Back to the worst joke: American Pictures or my English or Danish homepage }
Bush finally defeats Clinton
What's the new game they're playing in the White House?
Swallow the Leader.
What does Monica Lewinsky have on her resume?
"Sat on the Presidential Staff"
In a survey of American women, when asked, "Would you sleep with
President Clinton", 86% replied, "Not again"
Dr. Suess on Clinton
I'm here to ask
As you'll soon see --
Did you grope
Miss Lewinsky?
Did you grope her
In your house?
Did you grope
Beneath her blouse?
I did not do that
>Here or there--
I did not do that
I did not do that
Near or far --
I did not do that
Did you smile?
Did you flirt?
Did you peek
Beneath her skirt?
And did you tell
the girl to lie
When called upon
To testify?
I do not like you
Starr-You-Are --
 think that you
Have gone too far.
I will not answer
Any more --
Perhaps I will go
Start a war!
The public's easy
To distract --
When bombs are
Falling on Iraq!


An elderly man and woman meet in a bar and get to talking. They are =
enjoying their conversation so much that, when the bar closes, they =
decide to continue at the woman's apartment. After a time, things start =
getting pretty romantic and they wind up in bed. Afterward, they're both =
laying there, staring at the ceiling. The old man is thinking... "Gosh, =
if I had known she was a virgin, I would have been more careful with =
her." The old lady is thinkin... "Geez, if I had known he could get it =
up, I would have taken off my panties." 
One day a grumpy old man was taking care of his grandson when he decided =
to have a nice cold beer. When the child saw this he asked "Grandpa, can =
I have some?" and the Grandpa replied, "Does your dick reach your ass?" =
"No," said the child. "Then you can't have any beer!" Later on the =
Grandpa decides to have a cigar and once again the child asks him if he =
can smoke one too and the Grandpa replied, "Does you dick reach your =
ass?" and once again the child says no so the Grandpa told him he =
couldn't have none. A few hours later the child comes in with two ice =
creams one in each hand and the Grandpa asks him, "Can I have an ice =
cream?" and the child asks him, "Does your dick reach your ass?" The =
Grandpa feeling confident replies, "YES!" and the child tells him, "Then =
go fuck yourself!" 

Monday, two boys were in court after doing their community service for =
vandalism charges, and the judge said to the first one, "How did you do =
over the weekend?" "Well, your honor, I persuaded 17 people to give up =
drugs forever." "17 people? That's wonderful. What did you tell them?" =
"I used a diagram, your honor. I drew two circles and told them this =
(the big circle) is your brain before drugs and this (small circle) is =
your brain after drugs." "That's admirable," said the judge. "And you, =
how did you do?" (to the 2nd boy) "Well, your honor, I persuaded 156 =
people to give up drugs forever." "156 people! That's amazing! How did =
you manage to do that!" "Well, I used a similar approach. (draws two =
circles) I said (pointing to small circle) this is your asshole before =
prison..... and (pointing to the large circle) this is your asshole =
after prison. 
Three guys were applying for the priesthood. The Cardinal was going to =
give them a test. He tied a bell attached to a string on each of their =
penises. He told them that he was going to show them pictures of naked =
girls and if the bells rang then they would flunk the priesthood test. =
He showed the first guy the pictures and nothing happened. "you passed", =
the Cardinal said. He showed the naked girls to the second guy.  Nothing =
happened. "you passed." He showed the pictures to the third guy.  =
Nothing happened. The Cardinal said "all of you passed." The Cardinal =
turned to put away the pictures but dropped them. He bent over to pick =
them up and all three bells went "ding, ding,ding." 


Clinton and the Pope
Clinton and the Pope died on the same day, due to some administrative foul
up, Clinton gets sent to heaven and the Pope gets sent to hell. The Pope
explains the situation to the hell administration, they check their
paperwork, and the error is acknowledged.  They explain, however, that it
will take about 24 hours to make the switch.  The next day, the Pope is
called in and the hell administration bids him farewell   and  he heads
for heaven.  On the way up, he meets Clinton and they stop to chat.
Pope:  Sorry about the mix up.
Clinton:  No problem.
Pope:  Well, I'm really excited about going to heaven.
Clinton:  Why's that?
Pope:  All my life I've wanted to meet the Virgin Mary.
Clinton: You're a day late.

sick sick sick!
Q: Why was it difficult for Clinton to fire Monica Lewinsky?
A: He couldn't give her a pink slip without asking her to try it on
Q: What do Monica Lewinsky and Bob Dole have in common?
A: They were both upset when Bill finished first.
Q: What is Bill's definition of safe sex?
A: When Hillary is out of town.
Q: What is the difference between Clinton and the Titanic?
A: Only 200 women went down on the Titanic.
Q: How does Bill keep Monica Lewinsky away from the White House?
A: He keeps offering to send Ted Kennedy over to give her a ride.
President Clinton looks up from his desk in the Oval Office to see
one of his aides nervously approach him. "What is it?" exclaims the
President. "It's this Abortion Bill Mr. President, what do you want
to do about it?" the aide replies. "Just go ahead and pay it."
responds the President.
So it's about Bill Clinton's new revelations about his sex life.
Seems today he finally admitted that he had sex with Gennifer
Flowers a couple of times....but he didn't come.
Q. What does Bill say to Hillary after a romantic interlude?
A: "Honey, I'll be home in 20 minutes."
Q: Why does Bill Clinton cheat on Hillary?
A: He wants to be on top.
Q: How did Bill Clinton paralyze Hillary from the waist down?
A: He married her.
Clinton is looking out of the window and he notices that someone has
urinated the message, "BILL SUCKS!" on a wall outside the White
House. Furious, he orders the FBI to take urine and handwriting
samples from every member of the White House staff and find the
culprit immediately. A week later, the FBI director calls. "Mr.
President, I have good news and bad news," he says. "The good news
is that the urine belongs to Bob Dole." "And the bad news?" Clinton
demands. After a slight pause, the director replies, "Sir, the
handwriting belongs to your wife!"
Q: How many women does it take to satisfy Bill Clinton's sexual
A: It Takes A Village!
President French-Fry was out jogging when a Hooker standing on the
corner hailed him. "Hey Mr. President! Fifty bucks!" "No, no." Bill
replied with a grin, "Five bucks!" and kept on jogging. This
exchange soon became a part of the President's normal routine. Each
day as he'd approach the corner, the hooker would yell out, "Hey Mr.
President... Fifty Bucks!" and Bill would holler back, "No, Five
Bucks!" Well, one day, Hillary decided she wanted to go jogging with
Bill. As they neared the corner, Bill suddenly realized what a
terrible scene was about to happen. Sure enough, there was the
hooker, and just like all the other times she smiled and waved and
yelled out, "Hey Mr. President......See what you get for Five
Q: How does Bill Clinton teach a woman to golf?
A: He starts with the irons and ends up in the woods.
Q: When did Clinton realize Paula Jones wasn't a Democrat?
A: When she didn't swallow everything he presented.
"One thing's for sure about Clinton...
He sure doesn't neglect domestic affairs!"
Q: What's the difference between Bill Clinton and a gigolo?
A: A gigolo can only screw one person at a time.
Q: What's the definition of an Arkansas Virgin?
A: A girl that can run faster than the Governor.
Q: What does Teddy Kennedy have that Bill Clinton wishes *he* did?
A: A dead girlfriend.
Q: Why did Bill go out to sea on an aircraft carrier?
A: To promote off-shore drilling.
Q: What game did Bill Clinton want Paula Jones to play?
A: Swallow the leader
Q: Why is Clinton so interested in events in the Middle East?
A: He thinks the Gaza Strip is a topless bar.

What advice did Yasar Arafat give President Clinton in their recent
"Bill....Goats don't talk!!"
President Clinton said to Monica, "I didn't tell you to lie in
I told you to lie in THAT POSITION!"
What's the actual title of Hillary's book?
"It Takes a Village . . . to Satisfy my Husband"
"It Takes a Village . . . to keep an eye on my Husband"
Realization from another White House intern . . .
And all that time I thought  that humming was the shredder!
Don't feel sorry for Monica.....
She'll be back "on her knees" in no time!
Why does Clinton think he's innocent,
Because she didn't inhale!
Bill wasted all that energy running for President.
He thought they said the "Oral" Office
Bill is such a fool.
He could have gotten away with it if he had settled for "Vice"
.......last one:
Bill and Hilary drove to a gas station. To their surprise, the attendant 
was an old boyfriend of Hilary's, and they greeted each other and chatted 
abit. As they were driving off, Bill said, "Well, if you had married that 
guy, you would have been the wife of a gas station attendant!"   "No," 
she said, "if I had married that guy, HE would be president now."

        "Any girl can be glamourous.  All you have to do is stand
        still and look stupid." --- Hedy Lamarr
        "When women are depressed they either eat or go shopping.  Men
        invade another country." --- Elayne Boosler
        "I base most of my fashion taste on what doesn't itch."
        --- Gilda Radner
        "Behind every successful man is a surprised woman."
        --- Maryon Pearson
        "Our struggle today is not to have a female Einstein get
        appointed as an assistant professor.  It is for a woman
        schlemiel to get as quickly promoted as a male schlemiel."
        ---  Bella Abzug
        "In politics, if you want anything said, ask a man; if you
        want anything done, ask a woman." --- Margaret Thatcher
        "If I were going to convert to any religion I would probably
        choose Catholicism because it at least has female saints and
        the Virgin Mary." --- Margaret Atwood
        "I have yet to hear a man ask for advice on how to combine
        marriage and a career." --- Gloria Steinem
        "Some of us are becoming the men we wanted to marry."
        --- Gloria Steinem
        "Sometimes I wonder if men and women really suit each other.
        Perhaps they should live next door and just visit now and
        then." --- Katharine Hepburn
        "I never married because there was no need. I have three pets
        at home which answer the same purpose as a husband. I have a
        dog which growls every morning, a parrot which swears all
        afternoon and a cat that comes home late at night."
        --- Marie Corelli
        "Nagging is the repetition of unpalatable truths."
        --- Baroness Edith Summerskill
        "If men can run the world, why can't they stop wearing
        neckties? How intelligent is it to start the day by tying a
        little noose around your neck?" --- Linda Ellerbee
        "I am a marvelous housekeeper.  Every time I leave a man
        I keep his house." --- Zsa Zsa Gabor
Three nuns made it to heaven's gate where ST. Peter told
them in order to get in they each have to answer one question correctly.  
He asked the first nun: Who was the first man on earth ?  
She said: Adam 
Very good, said saint Peter, You can go in heaven.
He asked the second nun: Who was the first woman on earth ? 
She said: Eve
Excellent, said Peter , You  go in heaven also. 
He asked the third nun: what was the first thing that Eve said to Adam ? 
She said: Oh  my goodness that's a hard one-    
then, she too went inside heaven's gate
c/o Mattel, Inc.
El Segundo, CA 90245
Santa Claus
North Pole, North Pole
December 23, 1997

Dear Santa:
Listen you fat little troll, I've been helping you out every  year, 
playing at being the perfect Christmas Present, wearing  skimpy bathing 
suits in frigid weather, and drowning in fake tea  from one too many tea 
parties, and I hate to break it to ya  Santa, but IT'S DEFINITELY PAYBACK
TIME!    There had better be some changes around here this Christmas, or 
I'm gonna call for a nationwide meltdown (and trust me, you  won't wanna 
be around to smell it). 
So, here's my holiday wish   list for 1997, Santa:   
1. A nice, comfy pair of sweat pants and a frumpy, oversized  sweatshirt.
I'm sick of looking like a hooker. How much  smaller are these bathing 
suits gonna get? Do you have  any  idea what it feels like to have nylon
and velcro crawling  up  your butt?   
2. Real underwear that can be pulled on and off. Preferably  white. What
bonehead at Mattel decided to cheap out and  MOLD  imitation underwear to
my skin?!? It looks like  cellulite!   
3. A REAL man...maybe GI Joe. Hell, I'd take Tickle-Me Elmo  over that 
wimped-out excuse for a boytoy Ken. And what's with that earring 
anyway? If I'm gonna have to suffer  with  him, at least make him (and
me) anatomically correct. 
4. Arms that actually bend so I can push the aforementioned  Ken-wimp
away once he is anatomically correct. 
5. Breast reduction surgery. I don't care whose arm you have  to twist,
just get it done.    
6. A jogbra. To wear until I get the surgery.  
7. A new career. Pet doctor and school teacher just don't  cut it. How
about a systems analyst? Or better yet, a public relations senior 
account exec!   
8. A new, more 90s persona. Maybe "PMS Barbie", complete  with a
miniature container of chocolate chip cookie dough  ice cream and a bag
of chips; "Animal Rights Barbie",  with my very own paint gun, 
outfitted with a fake fur coat,  bottle  of spray on blood and handcuffs;
or "Stop Smoking Barbie,"  sporting a removable Nicotrol patch and 
equipped with  several  packs of gum. 
9. No more McDonald's endorsements. The grease is wrecking  my vinyl.  
10. Mattel stock options. It's been 37 years-I think I  deserve  it. 
Ok, Santa, that's it. Considering my valuable contribution to  society, I
don't think these requests are out of line. If you  disagree, then you
can find yourself a new bitch for next  Christmas. It's that simple.
Yours truly,
Subject: A Cowboy's Wish
A bunch of Indians capture a cowboy and bring him back to their
camp to meet the chief. The chief says to the cowboy, "You going
to die. But we sorry for you, so give you one wish a day for
three days.  On sundown of third day, you die.  What is first
wish?"  The cowboy says, "I want to see my horse."  The Indians
get his horse.  The cowboy grabs the horse's ear and whispers
something, then slaps the horse on the ass.  The horse takes
off.  Two hours later the horse comes back with a naked blonde. 
She jumps off the horse and goes into the teepee with the
cowboy.  The Indians look at each other, figuring,  "Typical
white man - can only think of one thing."
The seond day the chief says, "What your wish today?"  The
cowboy says, "I want to see my horse again."  The Indians bring
him his horse.  The cowboy leans over to the horse and whispers
something in the horse's ear, then slaps it on the ass.  Two
hours later, the horse comes back with a naked redhead.  She
gets off and goes in the teepee with the cowboy.  The Indians
shake their heads, figuring, "Typical white man - going to die
tomorrow and can only think of one thing." 
The last day comes, and the chief says, "This your last wish,
white man.  What you want?"  The cowboy says, "I want to see my
horse again."  The Indians bring him his horse.  The cowboy
grabs the horse by both ears, twists them hard, and yells, "Read
my lips!  POSSE, damn it! P - O - S - S - E!"

A little old lady went into the Royal Bank of Canada HO one day, 
carrying a bag of money.  She insisted that she must speak with the
president of the bank to open a savings account because, "It's a lot of
After much hemming and hawing, the bank staff finally ushered her
into the president's office (the customer is always right!).The bank
president then asked her how much she would like to deposit.  She
replied, "$165,000!" and dumped the cash out of her bag onto his desk.
The president was of course curious as to how she came by all this 
cash, so he asked her, "Ma'am, I'm surprised you're carrying so much
cash around. 
Where did you get this money?"
The old lady replied, "I make bets."
The president then asked, "Bets? What kind of bets?"
The old woman  said, "Well, for example, I'll bet you $25,000 that
your balls are square."
Ha!" laughed the president, "That's a stupid bet. You can never win 
that kind of bet!"
The old lady challenged, "So, would you like to take my bet?" Sure," said
the president, "I'll bet $25,000 that my balls are not square!"
The little old lady then said, "Okay, but since there is a lot of 
money involved, may I bring my lawyer with me tomorrow at 10:00 am 
"Sure!" replied the confident president.
That night, the president got very nervous about the bet and spent a 
long time in front of a mirror checking his balls, turning from side
to side, again and again. He thoroughly checked them out until he was sure
that there was absolutely no way his balls were square and that he would 
win the bet.
The next morning, at precisely 10:00 am, the little old lady appeared
with her lawyer at the president's office. She introduced the lawyer to 
the president and repeated the bet:  "$25,000 says the president's balls are
The president agreed with the bet again and the old lady asked him
to drop his pants so they could all see.  The president complied. The
little old lady peered closely at his balls and then asked if she 
could feel them. "Well, Okay, said the president, "$25,000 is a lot of
money, so I guess you should be absolutely sure."
Just then, he noticed that the lawyer was quietly banging his head 
against the wall.
The president asked the old lady, "What the hell's is the  matter
with your lawyer?"
She replied, "Nothing, except I bet him $100,000 that at 10:00 am 
today, I'd have The Bank of Canada's president's balls in my hand."
Subject:       A very Serious warning!
This was forwarded to me.  Please read it and send it to everyone you
know who could be at risk.
This story came from the  "DailyTexan" - the University of Texas
newspaper. Apparently it occurred during Fall Premier -- a UT
tradition that is a celebration of the end of midterms.
  "Reason not to party anymore"
 This guy went out last Saturday night to a party.  He was having a
 good time, had a couple of beers and some girl seemed to like him and
 invited him to go to another party.  He quickly agreed and decided to
 go along with her.
 She took him to a party in some apartment and they continued to drink,
 and even got involved with some other drugs (unknown which).
 The next thing he knew, he woke up completely naked in a bathtub
 filled with ice.  He was still feeling the effects of the drugs, but
 looked around to see he was alone. He looked down at his chest, which
 had "CALL 911 OR YOU WILL DIE" written on it in lipstick. He saw a
 phone was on a stand next to the tub, so he picked it up and dialed.
 He explained to the EMS operator what the situation was and that he
 didn't know where he was, what he took, or why he was really calling.
 She advised him to get  out of the tub. He did, and she asked him to
 look himself over in the mirror.
 He did, and appeared normal, so she told him to check his back.  He
 did, only to find two 9 inch slits on his lower back. She told him to
 get back in the tub immediately, and they sent a rescue team over.
 Apparently, after being examined, he found out more of what had
 His kidneys were stolen.
 They are worth 10,000 dollars each on the black market. 
 Several guesses are in order: The second party was
 a sham, the people involved had to be at least medical students, and
 it was not just recreational drugs he was given.
 Regardless, he is currently in the  hospital on life support, awaiting
 a spare kidney. The University of Texas in conjunction with Baylor
 University Medical Center is conducting tissue research to match the
 sophomore student with a donor.
 I wish to warn you about a new crime ring that is targeting business
 travelers. This ring is well organized, well funded, has very skilled
 personnel, and is currently in most major cities and recently very
 active in New Orleans.
 The crime begins when a business traveler goes to a lounge for a drink
 at the end of the work day.  A person in the bar walks up as they sit
 alone and offers to buy them a drink. The last thing the traveler
 remembers until they wake up in a hotel room bath tub, their body
 submerged to their neck in ice, is sipping that drink.
 There is a note taped to the wall instructing them not to move and to
 call 911.  A phone is on a small table next to the bathtub for them to
 The business traveler calls 911 who have become quite familiar with
 this crime.  The business traveler is instructed by the 911operator to
 very slowly and carefully reach behind them and feel if there is a
 tube protruding from their lower back.  The business traveler finds
 the tube and answers, "Yes."  The 911 operator tells them to remain
 still,  having already sent paramedics to help. The operator knows
 that both of the business traveler's kidneys have been harvested.
 This is not a scam or out of a science fiction novel, it is real.
 It is documented and confirmable.  If you travel or someone close to
 you travels, please be careful.
 Sadly, this is very true.  My husband is a Houston Firefighter/EMTand
 they have received alerts regarding this crime ring.  It is to be
 taken very seriously.
 The daughter of a friend of a fellow firefighter had this happen to
 her. Skilled doctor's are performing these crimes! (which, by the way
 have been highly noted in the Las Vegas area). Additionally, the
 military has received alerts regarding this.
 This story blew me away.  I really want as many people to see this as
 possible so please bounce this to whoever you can.
This was actually posted very briefly on the McDonnell Douglas website by
an employee there who obviously has a sense of humor.  The company made
the web department take it down immediately.
    Thank you for purchasing a McDonnell Douglas military aircraft.
    In order to protect your new investment, please take a few moments
    to fill out the warranty registration card below.  Answering the
    survey questions is not required, but the information will help us to
    develop new products that best meet your needs and desires.
    1. [_] Mr.  [_] Mrs.  [_] Ms.  [_] Miss  [_] Lt.
       [_] Gen.  [_] Comrade  [_] Classified  [_] Other
     First Name: ......................................................
        Initial: ........
      Last Name: .....................................................
       Password: .............................. (max 8 char)
      Code Name: ......................................................
      Latitude-Longitude-Altitude: ...........  ...........  ..........
    2. Which model aircraft did you purchase?
     [_] F-14 Tomcat
     [_] F-15 Eagle
     [_] F-16 Falcon
     [_] F-117A Stealth
     [_] Classified
    3. Date of purchase (Year/Month/Day): 19....... / ...... / .......
    4. Serial Number: .................................................
    5. Please check where this product was purchased:
     [_] Received as gift / aid package
     [_] Catalog showroom
     [_] Independent arms broker
     [_] Mail order
     [_] Discount store
     [_] Government surplus
     [_] Classified
    6. Please check how you became aware of the McDonnell Douglas
       product you have just purchased:
     [_] Heard loud noise, looked up
     [_] Store display
     [_] Espionage
     [_] Recommended by friend / relative / ally
     [_] Political lobbying by manufacturer
     [_] Was attacked by one
    7. Please check the three (3) factors that most influenced your
       decision to purchase this McDonnell Douglas product:
     [_] Style / appearance
     [_] Speed / maneuverability
     [_] Price / value
     [_] Comfort / convenience
     [_] Kickback / bribe
     [_] Recommended by salesperson
     [_] McDonnell Douglas reputation
     [_] Advanced Weapons Systems
     [_] Backroom politics
     [_] Negative experience opposing one in combat
    8. Please check the location(s) where this product will be used:
     [_] North America
     [_] Central / South America
     [_] Aircraft carrier
     [_] Europe
     [_] Middle East
     [_] Africa
     [_] Asia / Far East
     [_] Misc. Third World countries
     [_] Classified
    9. Please check the products that you currently own or intend to
       purchase in the near future:
     [_] Color TV
     [_] VCR
     [_] ICBM
     [_] Killer Satellite
     [_] CD Player
     [_] Air-to-Air Missiles
     [_] Space Shuttle
     [_] Home Computer
     [_] Nuclear Weapon
    10. How would you describe yourself or your organization?
        (Check all that apply:)
     [_] Communist / Socialist
     [_] Terrorist
     [_] Crazed
     [_] Neutral
     [_] Democratic
     [_] Dictatorship
     [_] Corrupt
     [_] Primitive / Tribal
    11. How did you pay for your McDonnell Douglas product?
     [_] Deficit spending
     [_] Cash
     [_] Suitcases of cocaine
     [_] Oil revenues
     [_] Personal check
     [_] Credit card
     [_] Ransom money
     [_] Traveler's check
    12. Your occupation:
     [_] Homemaker
     [_] Sales / marketing
     [_] Revolutionary
     [_] Clerical
     [_] Mercenary
     [_] Tyrant
     [_] Middle management
     [_] Eccentric billionaire
     [_] Defense Minister / General
     [_] Retired
     [_] Student
    13. To help us understand our customers' lifestyles, please
        indicate the interests and activities in which you and your
        spouse enjoy participating on a regular basis:
     [_] Golf
     [_] Boating / sailing
     [_] Sabotage
     [_] Running / jogging
     [_] Propaganda / disinformation
     [_] Destabilization / overthrow
     [_] Default on loans
     [_] Gardening
     [_] Crafts
     [_] Black market / smuggling
     [_] Collectibles / collections
     [_] Watching sports on TV
     [_] Wines
     [_] Interrogation / torture
     [_] Household pets
     [_] Crushing rebellions
     [_] Espionage / reconnaissance
     [_] Fashion clothing
     [_] Border disputes
     [_] Mutually Assured Destruction
  Thank you for taking the time to fill out this questionnaire. Your
  answers will be used in market studies that will help McDonnell
  Douglas serve you better in the future - as well as allowing you to
  receive mailings and special offers from other companies,
  governments, extremist groups, and mysterious consortia.
  Comments or suggestions about our fighter planes? Please write to:
  Marketing Department
  Military Aerospace Division
  P.O. Box 800, St. Louis, MO
Warning! Do take the test as you read, there are only 5  questions, and
if you scan all the way to the end before finishing you won't get  the
honest results.
Don't cheat.  Scroll slowly and do each exercise.
Don't look ahead.
Get pencil and paper and write it down.
You will need it at the end.
Chapter I
Arrange the following 5 animals according to your preference:
Chapter II
Write one word to describe each of the following:
Chapter III
Think of somebody (who also knows you) that you can relate to the
following colors:
(Please don't  repeat your answer twice only one person for each color)

And finally, indicate your favorite number and favorite day.

(See interpretations below) :
But before going on,  just make  one wish.......)
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                           \                        /
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                              \                  /
                               \                /
                                \              /
                                 \            /
                                  \          /
                                   \        /
                                    \      /
                                     \    /
                                      \  /
Chapter I
(This will define your priorities in life)
Cow means career
Tiger means  pride
Sheep  means love
Horse means family
Monkey means money
Chapter II
Your description of Dog implies your own personality
Your description of Cat implies your partner's  personality
Your description of Rat implies your enemy's personality
Your description of Coffee is how you interpret sex
Your description of Ocean implies your own life
Chapter III
Yellow -  somebody who will never forget you
Orange -  someone whom you can consider as your real friend
Red -someone you really love
White - your soulmate
Green -  a person whom you will always remember for the rest
of your life
Your favorite number will be the number of persons you will be sending
this test to and the favorite day will be the day that your wish will
come true!

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